BY ELLIE CONSTANTINOU
Our lives
are a journey and the path we have travelled up until this point has been
filled with opportunities, trials and other people, all placed in our lives for
a reason. It’s easy to look back on past experiences with regret, upset and
anger. It’s easy to adopt a “We can’t change the past” attitude towards the
things they have done or the things they have felt, yet everything we have
experienced can be changed. It’s just down to us. We can’t change what has
happened, take back the words we’ve said or the things that we’ve done. Yet we
can change the way we look back on what has happened and the emotions we feel
towards it.
Past
circumstances, friendships and relationships can have such a negative and
emotional charge on us. In the past I’ve placed blame on others, regretted the
choices I’ve made, and spent so much time living in the past. Like everyone
else, I have a tendency to overthink situations, replay conversations in my
head and constantly think “What if?”
The problem with living in the past is that you miss out on the present.
Thinking
about past situations or people that used to be in your life only takes up time
that you could be spending doing other things. This is time that you could spend
on bettering yourself, your current situation or investing in the people that
are currently around you and the people that really matter today. Focusing on
the past only causes a gap and disconnect between yourself and your future.
Rewriting the past and rebranding yourself is key to self-growth.
Instead of
looking back on situations with hurt or anger, we can change our perspective in
order to learn from them. We can look back on arguments and failures with a
sense of gratitude. The things we’ve experienced have made us who we are today.
These exact experiences have shaped our feelings, values and commitments,
creating a life that’s different from one lived by anyone else. Without these
experiences, we wouldn’t notice a need to rebrand or rewrite ourselves and we’d
be stuck living the same life day-in, day-out.
No-one said you have to be the same person forever. You are the
architect of your own life.
Life
becomes easier and more fulfilling when you are constantly looking to be better
and do better. Wanting to create a better version of yourself allows you to be
committed to your actions, experience new senses of yourself and live
intentionally.
If you’re
the architect of your own life, you have the power to change the plans. Your
past is your foundation, and you are able to structure it in any way that you
choose. No one can hold you accountable to remaining the same person your whole
life. You’re allowed to change, rebrand and start all over again if you really
need to.
Your past and mistakes don't define who you are becoming.
Your past
shouldn't hold you back. Nothing that you used to do or used to believe should
block your future opportunities. Your beliefs are allowed to change. This
doesn't mean that you’re fake or easily influenced, it means that you’re
improving, developing and able to understand that change is inevitable in order
to grow.
Anyone that holds you back needs to leave.
I could
write pages and pages about how dropping people out is sometimes necessary for
growth, but I can’t get my point across enough. I believe that the people that
you surround yourself with play the biggest role in your growth and your
happiness. If you have negative, doubtful or jealous people around you, there’s
no way you can move away from the person you used to be and become better.
Challenge
yourself to rewrite your story and commit to being the only author right now
and in the memories and opportunities you create with every move forward.
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